Then I went to Heaven, but only in my dream.
Up there I met St. Peter standing at the Pearly Gates,
He said "I must check your records, so please stand here and wait."
He turned and said "Your record is covered with bad & terrible, flaws,
On earth I see you rallied for every losing cause.
I see that you drank alcohol and smoked and used drugs, too,
Fact is, you' ve done everything a good person should never do.
We can't have people like you up here - your life was full of sin,
Then he read the last of my record - took my hand and said "Come in!"
He led me up to the big boss and said, "Take him in and treat him well,
he used to work in Philadelphia as a Disc Jockey -- he's done his time in
Hell."
